I just had another friend get engaged on Wednesday (Granted, I didn't listen to the message until Thursday). And even I was surprised at my reaction. I gasped. Then smiled. I was truly happy for her.
People (myself included) have come to think I'm abhorrent to the idea of love and marriage. But my reaction to said friend's engagement defies that conclusion (I even bought a bottle of champagne to celebrate with them). My reaction was much like it was to my two fellow married bloggers' wedding news years ago. So after a week's worth of reflection as to why my reaction to wedding news varies so much, I've come to a few of my own recent conclusions.
It's not the idea of marriage that disturbs me. But it's getting married to escape an unhappy life that disturbs me. It's marrying someone because you're afraid to be alone that disturbs me. And it's marrying someone to use them (or be used) that disturbs me.
I freak out not because I hate the idea of marriage. But because I think so highly of it.
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2 comments:
NO worries, girly. We're all so YOUNG still!
My deary, forget thy liverwurst heart and intrepid sorrows, pull thy self from the orbit that is self-deceit. If only thou knewest what thou wasn't ere thou writ one more despicable word on thy blog, thou wouldest know thy deepest godly night terrors. Look into thy mirror, and know thee, and smash thou face into primordial custard of thy own past.
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